BYE BYE MO MO
Well we said good bye to baby Mo Mo/Elmo last night. Big Diva, Little Diva and The Small Post Man, were all there to send her off with Gaga Drama and My Sister to take her to her grandparents. The dinner the night before went well and they all made promises to stay in each other's lives, there was joy and sorrow as each party will be leaving a little one behind. The Grandparents will board a plane today without their grandson and our family just said good bye to a sister/cousin...so happiness and sadness. We are praying that as the years progress our bond will grow stronger and Baby Mo Mo will know her "other" family as we have become. This brings up so many thoughts about adoption and adoptive families and the interesting family structures adoption creates. In our family we have Big Diva and her big sister, and Big Diva's niece who have also adopted Little Diva as a sister and then in Little Diva's family she will have her birth mom and now the Small Postman has a family far away too....all of us are of many colors, cultures and communities and all of us are a family.
I think this was the best case scenario for baby Mo Mo as the grandparents will have a grand child to raise, my sister, lets call her Momma Music, will finally feel freer to be a mom and really bond, love and adore her incredible Small Postman and my mom...well, Gaga Drama may be the hardest hit by all of this. However, raising Baby Mo Mo wasn't in her life plan, whether it be divine intervention, intention or plan, she is to forge forward without little Mo Mo in her daily life. I do venture to say that raising a child to adulthood, is a glorious gift and a blessing. However, raising many children through their hardships, fears and transitions and supporting birth parents or family to reunite with lost children, by giving love unconditionally and unselfishly....well that just feels like a level of divinity. It feels slightly raised from the average human existence and rests in a place one may consider divine. So mom...there you are.
A MOUSE!!!!!!!!! Yes, a freaking, bleeping MOUSE!!!! Now, since moving to my amazing HUGE new place, I have had some of the drama that normal home owners face, namely rodents. NEVER INSIDE, but we have had roof rats on the roof and I have seen a few outside. Its normal. I'm not too stressed, the landlord closed stuff up and now we just hear them scratch to get in sometimes. So I am cooler with it than I was. Okay, so yesterday I'm on the phone with Momma Music and we are just. ya know gushing about our little spawns and I SEE IT!!!!! A FREAKING, BLEEPING MOUSE!!!! Now I am not really afraid of mice, I don't want to live with them, but if I see them out in the wild I don't crawl up the nearest tree, but I don't want them inside...nope! However, this mouse wasn't of the alive variety...and there is the problem.
IT WAS A DEAD MOUSE and it just magically appeared in my doorway...DEAD!!! Okay, so here's the thing. I don't do dead. I just don't. If something dies in my house, IT IS NOT MY PROBLEM. The fish were hard enough and it took every ounce of everything I had in me to scoop them up with, what I now loving refer to as, The Death Net and put them in a burial receptacle and trust me it usually took me a whole day to gear up to just do that. And really if it was bigger than a fish, or a small spider or it was any form of roach...it is NOT MY PROBLEM!!!! So I have a love/um.."pissed off at" relationship with God, but down deep, I know we're good. "God" hasn't proven that he is a bearded man or woman (eek) or a swirling mass of energy, so I haven't fully committed to what I believe about him/her/it(s) However, I do know this one thing, I DO NOT DO DEAD...not! So, by issuing this heavily executed proclamation, God has spared me from dead things. So there I was, with a problem, dead thing + me = no bueno! So, I'm on the phone freaking out to Momma Music and she was like, okay my father in law is on his way over to our house, why don't I tell him to go over there and get THE DEAD MOUSE!!!! Momma Drama breaths a sigh..."yes, you do that!" And there again, the universe has proven to me, that I don't do dead things!!!!
Papa Music shows up, with a paper towel already in hand and I caution him that some sort of machine powered crane and protective body armor are needed for this job and he waves me off with his ungloved hand and forges into my very messy (ah, flush with embarrassment)house. I can't look. I.Just.Can't.Look. But I hear...."oh he's not dead yet!" Breath Momma Drama, don't faint....breath. But the first thing that comes to mind is "So, what am I supposed to do??? I don't do almost dead either." No really, the first thing that came to mind was, "great shoo him out, close the door and lets be done with this nonsense." However, the poor thing WAS almost dead...oh that's just fantastic, now we have a moral dilemma :( AAHHHH BLAH!!!! I hate moral dilemmas. So my vote was to still shoo it out and close the door. But Papa Music is a devout Christian and a much braver man than me and said..."Well, we should probably kill it" "WHAT?????? DID???? YOU SAY????? Momma Drama...hold back vomit...hold it, HOLD IT! If I don't do dead, I certainly don't do KILL!!!! And in my own warped sense of righteousnesses, sending a poor dying mouse into the world to suffer and expire was much more humane than ending his life and thus his suffering. Well, while looking for some sort of instrument of execution as Papa Music had instructed me to do, he did the deed and it was over...mouse gone. I am very grateful to Papa Music for coming over to my messy (hang head in embarrassment) house to pick up a dead mouse that he ended up having to kill....what a mess. YUCK. And when Diva Dad reads this story he will be quite displeased with Momma Drama, because, he like Papa Music, and unlike me, is also a brave soul, who would have handled the mouse well....so I fail. Whatever...I know how to fail just fine.
And speaking of Failure....(I am just kidding...really, no one needs to call me... I am just fine...really!)
INCREDIBLE STRESSED OUT SINGLE MOMS WHO I LOVE
Okay, I've already rambled on a bit, so I will try and make this brief. I have three single mommy friends, all of them are hot! All our kids are mixed brown and two of us are adoptive moms and one is a bio mom. We are: DIVA MOMMA (yes, I know another diva to keep track of...but trust me SHE IS the definition of Diva) Momma Drama (yours truly) and MOVIE STAR MOMMA (and she is just that)... okay there are the players...here is the logic.
ALL OF US ARE SINGLE MOMS BY CHOICE...okay. Here we go...
I would venture to say that we are not totally single moms by choice, we may have chosen to be moms, but again, I wonder. As some say being gay is a choice (which I don't believe, I am not gay, but have dappled a bit at being "I kissed a girl" gay as any young hot girl, when I was young and hot, would do) so.... I don't know if we chose to be moms, I think we didn't really have a choice as none of us would have chosen any kind of life that didn't have our own children in it. I don't think we chose to be single (who does that?) I think after a string of heartbreaks, loves, life experiences etc. single sort of happened. Trust me, as I said, all three of us ladies are HOT (me not so much anymore, but I was hot, when hot mattered) the other two...still very HOT! So I don't think it was men not wanting us, I think it was us not wanting the men that wanted us, and holding out (possibly) forever for something better. But, like people who are gay, I don't think living without children in our lives was ever a consideration, it simply had to happen, just like gay people chose/or don't really "chose" to love who they love, we chose to parent who we parent.
So...okay. All three of the Hot Mommas are facing a bit of a life crisis at the moment. It looks like Diva Mom and I might be moving abroad together and Movie Star Momma is just praying to get another gig. Now, movie star momma should be in every freaking movie out, she is so awesome, but she, like us (also richly talented) is struggling. Why do we struggle??? Well the economy is in the sh!tter, that's one, but life says to single moms...hey you! You....YOU!!!! YOU scare us! And we do. We single handedly run households, do errands, chores, build financial futures, coif curls, field unwelcome and welcome stares, fight for rights, wipe noses, get therapy, party, enrich lives and such... Do you really think that we are going to take BS from you? THE MAN, do you really think you can tell us that we can't see our kids and that your stinking job is worth more to my life than Mine!!! No, I think not! We also call out BS, when we see it...like Hey You Boss Guy/Girl, that's BS...I don't have time for BS, BS is not on the calendar and seriously don't feed a single mom BS, we just don't have room in our day, so we will, with all kinds of tact and graciousness, wipe your @ss with your BS. We will be picking up our kids from school and we will be spending weekends with them, but guess what you just hired. A DYNAMO, we'll get done in an hour, what your entire corporation can do in a day...why? Well, hell, ya ever been a single mom???? Sheesh, when you do 72 hours of work in 24, you know how to get sh!t done.
Somehow THIS IS SCARY!!! And I can see why.
So, the Hot Single Mommas are in a bit of a spot. Every one of us has tried for a long time to get work/money/more work/more money. We have cried, but we have bucked up. We wear our brave face all day. We only hint at strife to each other and in a few words masked by Mommy Voices that call out and say...I'm losing it today, or um, inside, deep inside, I'm terrified. We all smile our super human smiles and forge on, knowing that with our incredible talent, strength and beauty this craziness must end. And yet we do face it, our kids only seeing cracks in the fissure but not the whole avalanche. I know that the Hot Single Moms will find their way, but I give a shout out to us today (and anyone putting up with all of it, playing the brave fighter!!!) I guess God/or whoever is in charge, wants us on the front line...who knows. But I love you ladies and I'm glad we have each other.